COZUMEL

November 20, 2011

Ahhh, the Prime Steakhouse. How do you want your meat cooked? The chefs are exact.

You say rare, and they do it rare.

The atmosphere is quite intimate, but the lighting is not photogenic.

I started with ahi tartare, then Lamb Chops, and THEN chocolate.

A morning pull of the drapes and we are in Cozumel.

Seven ships are in port today, and those only the ones I can see.

Figure from 15 to 20 thousand passengers hitting the shops. For most wants, the pier stores will provide. If you go into town, the merchants will be more persuasive and may get on your nerves. Most tourists think with the amount of people buying, negotiating will be a wasted effort. Not so. Remember, at the moment you are the customer; the merchant wants an on the spot sale like now. Bargain!

I have no idea how many VW taxis are in Cozumel, there must be hundreds, but this is must more fun.

On Magic, inspection is an every day duty.

By the way, talking about inspection this ship got 100% perfect before we sailed.

Not all left the ship for town. The splash area still dumped water on one and all.

There is a lookout stationed at the bottom of the slides. He radios when the slider splashes down to let the top sentry know the next can get in the tube.

Deck service is prompt

and the Carnival marketing team has come up with a unique drink container.

Some caught up on the news and weather on the big screen which features movies at night.

One thing I’ve noticed is a number of people paste or hang things on their cabin door. It’s kind of fun to see what’s along the hall,

never the less, I wonder if it’s not so much a want for decoration, but a way of locating where they live.

I’ve tried hard to find something to whine about on Magic. It’s the sovereign duty of a travel writer to tell about the bad as well as the good. I finally did.

At the beginning of each cruise, Carnival provides tooth paste, body wash, deodorant, etc. all are samples of retail products. On Magic there are about 8 or 9 different items. Included is a small plastic envelope of Q-tips; not a retail sample. They are not full size and “Q” is probably too far along in the alphabet to properly describe them.

When they were used up, I asked my room steward Ovi for a replacement envelope.

“I can’t give them to you. You have to buy them at the store.”

OK, I tried that and couldn’t find any Q-Tips.

As we docked in Cozumel, I asked Ovi again, making it clear, that I really wanted them and he should get them for me.

“You get them first day and no more.” Ovi emphasized.

I went off a bit and doubted that Carnival was so frugal that they couldn’t part with another envelope of 6 mini-tips.

Ovi, scowling, pulled out his phone.

“I’ll have to make a call.”

When I returned to my cleaned cabin there was a tray of goods,

but no Q-tips.

Oh no, here I had been overly stern with Ovi, and it was a miscommunication. I found him, apologized profusely, and explained to him what I meant. I gestured showing cotton at two ends connected by a skinny thingy.

“Yes”, Ovi said, “Q-tips. They won’t let me have any.”

OK, I mean, with the amount Carnival buys, those must cost a few pennies. But factor this in. A Margarita on the rocks costs $10.06. But, of course, that includes salt.

Finally I got a chance to get to the Punchliner comedy club. It was the early show, open to all, including children. Out came John Wesley Austin and blew me away.

Charming, funny, kids and parents and me laughing. Except for the woman next to me. Not even a smile. She probably thought it was supposed to be the art auction.

The Carnival Magic is an amazing ship. Next is the Destiny, amazing plus. When you compare cruise prices, and what you get for your money, there is an easy choice. Carnival Magic.

Tomorrow we dock in Galveston. At 7 AM the ship starts to empty. By 10 AM all will be heading home, except for one. He’s gong to keep cruising, no matter how long it takes, until he hits the Jackpot.

Magic Happened

November 18, 2011

My colleagues know that I am not a ship show enthusiast, but last night’s poles apart performance is better than any show I’ve seen on any ship. It’s called “Illusions”. The photo above is moments after a puff of smoke and an entire helicopter appeared. The old “saw the woman in half” was kind of basic, but then the bottom half of the woman walked around the stage. Nothing I write will begin to illuminate the magic of what happened on that stage last night.

A hint; the doors to the theater open at 10 PM. To get a good seat be at the door at 9:45. There will be a short line. The doors open, and in you go for that good seat, but, what to do for the half hour until Showtime. If you have an eReader, take it with you to pass the time. It works.

Not an illusion in any sense, but strangely mesmerizing to me is what I call the tub dump. The yellow tub fills and then about every minute it dumps!

I love the whole idea of this, and it just keeps on keepin’ on.

The whole water area is a kid’s haven. Carnival for years has had a wonderful children’s program but this takes the top award.

Amazingly, kids who hate to take a bath at home can’t be dragged away.

Adults have the spa.

Never mind a Jacuzzi, the effervescent pool works just fine, thank you.

Ok, children are all around, music playing, people dancing, water splashing, so where to hide? Look for this sign.

This may be the coolest warm spot on the ship.

Just think while you are unwinding, others are working hard to generate the power

for the bubbles in the tub.

Want water and some company. Dangle your feet.

Or stand in a pool.

Or if you really want to get soaked.

Also there’s Texas hold em, and then there’s Texas touch them

As you may guess, a ride down the big slide may well leave you dizzy and not sure which way to go. No hay problemo…just read.

Last night I had dinner in Cucina del Capitano.

This is a lovely restaurant with some great Italian food, plus some of “Grandma’s Recipes”. Our server was from Romania and smiled as she eased me through avoiding garlic. (weird allergy). I would pick what I wanted and she’d go to the chef and check. She then would come back with suggestions. Back to the chef. Suggestions narrowing down. Hooray for salmon and buttered pasta.

The Italian wine was in lovely bottles,

but poured from a barrel.

I think it’s important to have a fair amount of wine so you’ll be prepared when the staff sings and dances to “That’s Amore”.

But no pictures please.

We now leave Progreso for Cozumel. The question on many passengers minds is did the thruster that pushes us away from the dock get fixed. We report, you decide.

Night, night.

Magic Happens

November 16, 2011

The Carnival Magic is full. A bit over 3,700 passengers fill this ship. Think about this; if only half the passengers bring two bags, that is 5550 hunks of luggage.

It seems the new Carnival Magic has an eatery every ten feet. There’s pizza,

Mongolian Wok,

a deli, and on and on. The Southern Lights and the Northern Lights are the main dining rooms.

Last night we had a lovely server from Serbia. I ordered Minestrone, Alligator Fritters (don’t ask), and Chile Rellenos. First came the fritters, then the rellenos. But where’s the soup? When Alexi brought my main course, I asked about the soup. She blanched, then blushed, and apologized profusely.

“All is cool.” I said, “Just bring it now and I’ll have it with the rellenos.”

Heading for the kitchen, she apologized again, and again, and again. I finished the rellenos. No soup. More wine was poured, more bread came, no soup.

To tell the truth, I was now stuffed; not even room for dessert.

Here’s the soup! She apologized again, and again, and again.

Now what to do? Obviously I had to eat the soup or she’d think I was sulking or angry with her. Every spoonful a major effort. I won’t be able to slurp another bowl of Minestrone for months. The good news is Alexi and I are now friends

Oh, and the alligator fritters were great.I can’t wait for my next fritter.

Magic is scheduled to leave Galveston, spend two days at sea, next Costa Maya, then Cozumel, a day at sea, and home we go. Make “is” was. Apparently, we’ve got a thruster not thrusting. A thruster is a small jet that helps the ship cuddle carefully to the dock. A woman thought thruster was a dance step.

So instead of Costa Maya, we’re in Progreso on the tip of the Yucatan Peninsula for two days. Divers will work on the thruster. We’re next to the Carnival Elation.

The small town of Progreso is being invaded by 6000 people.

According to the table talk last night, the Progreso beach massage is a big draw.

Many will bus to Merida, a lovely town famous for its colonial architecture. While in Merida I came across this painting.

It, I am sure, depicts the discovery of ethanol.

Some lucky ones will head to Chichen-Itza, the extraordinary Mayan ruins depicted in the Mel Gibson movie. The ruins are close enough for a 7 hour tour. The price, an inexpensive $69.95.

Meanwhile, on board, a unique spot to eat and have a beer is the new Red Frog Pub.

Many brands of beer are featured,

but if you want a tall one, Carnival’s Red Frog is goooooood.The café also serves conch fritters, shrimp things, and other goodies. Magic will have Jamaica as part of its new itinerary, so the spicy sauces are from Jamaica.

They are hot, mon. I don’t remember finding these in our grocery store. If you like yours hot with flavor, take home the one featuring “Jamaican peppers”.

Tonight it’s dinner in Cucina del Capitano. Chow

GALVESTON MAGIC

November 16, 2011

There are two incentives to make this trip. Galveston Texas is a fascinating small city, and Carnival’s new ship, Magic soon starts sailing from there with me aboard.

I booked air to Houston on Southwest. This is the first time for me on this ubiquitous airline, and I’ll be happy to take it again. Here’s a hint if you fly Southwest: for ten bucks you can be first to board in section “A”. you also can check in online 12 hours before “the others”. Be sure to check www.seatguru.com to see the best place to plunk.

The flight to Houston was smooth, on time, and goodies were distributed, and two bags; no charge.

The drive to Galveston is about 45 minutes, with lots of Texas space, some taken up by the Space Center. (sorry). Then Galveston. As I approached I couldn’t help but notice the out lying homes build on pylons to escape flooding waters from hurricanes.

After the big storm in the late eighteen hundreds, the worst natural disaster in history, an immense seawall was erected

and Galveston also raised the level of the ocean facing part of the island. Yup, raised it. But, Ike came a few years ago and frustrated by all this, Ike’s water was forced into the bay, and, yes, the lower part of Galveston got very damp. The salt water killed the roots of most of the island’s Oak trees, but hey this is Galveston. The wood from removed dead oaks has been made into lovely bowls, and some of the still standing dead remains, cut to about 6 feet tall have been beautifully carved.

Galveston has mansions built over a hundred years ago,

 

 

 

 

 

and more recent less sedate homes.

Oh, and just houses too.

It is quite a mix.

 

 

 

 

I stayed at Hotel Galvez which is across the road from the beach and just hit the century mark.

It is rumored to be haunted, especially on the 5th floor. My room was on the fifth floor. I was, of course, not concerned, but late at night I heard a barely audible moaning. It was a woman’s voice. My pulse doubled and I thought “Wow, it’s true”. Then I remembered the huge wedding party in the hotel earlier. Oh well.

There are many things to see and do in Galveston. My favorite, especially for families, was the Schlitterbahn Waterpark. Slides,

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

ride the waves,

splash around,

and river raft.

Christmas rules the area; lights, decorations, and even Santa raising kids hopes. Thanksgiving?? well, it’s kind of on the way.

When you sail Carnival from Galveston, be sure and spend a couple of days in this great community. Be sure to eat at Rudy and Pacos. www.rudyandpacos.com

The Magic is in town!The new Magic holds 3690 passengers. We will be full for the cruise, but tonight is Gala night for half of Texas to explore the ship, eat, and overnight. The booze was free for all. Late at night some staggered down the passageways putting their card keys into slot after slot.

“What was our cabin number?”

“I told you to write it down.”

“Are you sure this is our deck?”

“I’m not feeling well.”

Talking about keys in the slot, when I entered my cabin

I couldn’t get my lights on. I pushed button after button. Frustrated, I pushed a button with a little green light on it really hard. It went into the wall. The green light went out, but no other light turned on. Wait, what’s this slot? Ahh, slide your key into it and lights on! Whee ha. Take your key when you leave and lights off. Brilliant energy saver. (Just thinking, is brilliant the right word, I mean the lights go out. Perhaps clever?)

I’m eating with the press group in the Northern Lights restaurant. Unlike most Carnival ahipa, although bright and flashy,  the slightly weird and Joe Farcus are gone.

Tomorrow we go on the Magic deck.

 

 

 

Now What?

November 2, 2011

Hundreds of people cowered for about two hours inside a shopping mall in this resort town Saturday while security forces traded sporadic gunfire with armed men in the parking lot and then searched stores for suspects.

No one was injured in the gun battle, and arrests were made, but hey, a shopping center?

Mexican tourist authorities have been yammering for weeks about how safe “tourist cities” are, and Cabo has never been a dangerous area. But hey, a shopping center.

What do the cruise lines do now? Mexican Riviera cruises are already feeling the Mexican malaise. Even now they no longer go to Mazatlan, and are getting nervous about Acapulco. (I will no longer get off the ship in Acapulco).

Or maybe they’ll feel safe knowing tourists are protected by the Mexican military.

Buena Suerte!

Going All The Way

October 22, 2011

On November 13th I’ll be reporting from Carnival Magic.

First a Gala Dinner to welcome Magic to Galveston, then 6 days to Mexico.

Late January it will be a second look at Holland America’s Nieuw Amsterdam.

Fast forward to April, and it’s through the Canal from Hollywood to New York on Crystal’s newly refurbished Serenity.

BUT FIRST

My new book; an inside look at two world cruises. The good, the bad, and the, well, strange. Available at all eBook sites

I took my first cruise from Los Angeles, through the Panama Canal, and around the Caribbean. The cruise ship was a small Greek ship called the Jason, but I must tell you, cruising then was entirely different than today. The cruise staff did most of the entertaining, most of the bands on ships had an accordion player, and customer service was a bit lax.

My cabin had a bunk on each wall with safety straps to keep you in bed in case of rough weather. The portholes had wooden covers that could be screwed on to keep that rough water out of the cabin. When I complained about the air conditioning in my cabin not working, the ship sent an engineer to check it out. A sturdy Greek woman with a hint of mustache appeared in full uniform. She had no command of English, and Greek was, well, Greek to me. Fortunately, we didn’t need much communication to get the job done. I held my hand to the vent and said, “Is warm!” She put her hand to the vent and said, “Is cold!” And that was that. As Aristotle once said, “It is the nature of desire not to be satisfied, and most men live only for the gratification of it.” Whatever.

As the Jason exited the canal into the Caribbean, we were pounded by some very rough seas, and she bounced around enough so that those straps and porthole covers came into play. I sat in the center of the ship on the Promenade deck, and, as advised, kept my eyes on the horizon. I wasn’t sick, but neither was I feeling well, and worse, I was hungry. They told us to eat dry chicken sandwiches which for some reason might stay in place after swallowed. On the Jason, everything was ordered from a desk just inside and off the main deck. I went up to the crewman on desk duty and asked for a dry chicken sandwich. He looked at me, said, “Please wait a moment.” He then opened a drawer, and from a height of about three feet, put most, if not all, of his stomach in the drawer. I passed on the sandwich.

That experience aside, a big attraction of cruising is the food. And there is lots, and lots of good food. With all that largess waiting, a good many passengers are wary of eating too much and gaining weight. I sat with one woman who looked at the menu and asked me what “grouper” was. I told her it was a whitefish that sometimes got as big as three hundred pounds. “Oh,” she said, “I’m really not that hungry.” Another tablemate ate a huge plate of pasta. After she finished, she was upset with the waiter. “I told him,” she said, “to give me a small portion.” “Well”, I countered, “there was a small portion in there.”

Today’s cruise guest has access to food 24 hours a day. Room service is always prompt, and the air conditioner will be adjusted to your liking. Nevertheless, no matter how luxurious the ships, most people who cruise share one single desire. One day, they want to cruise around the world!

I have been twice blessed in that regard, and what you are about to read is a diary of both of those blessings. Some of what I wrote will be a bit dated. For instance, all cruise ships now have access to the Internet operating 24 hours a day. Today’s passengers don’t have to seek out an Internet café at every port, and on a world cruise there are a lot of ports. But, you know, I think they’re missing something; that chance to interact with the locals and other travelers.

So hop aboard, have some laughs, and watch out for that reef off Egypt

Carnival Splendor Sails Again

February 27, 2011

It was unexpected, and as it turns out, unprecedented. One of Splendor’s diesel generators caught fire and within seconds the heat melted the above wiring thought safe, behind heavy insulation. All electrical power . . .  gone. Ship motionless. 3,299 passengers and 1,167 crew members without air conditioning, hot food. A diesel generator catching fire was the last thing any sailor would expect.

A special committee has been formed to try to find out how something like this could happen, and how to make sure it never happens again. The committee has air conditioning.

Major repairs were done in SFO. Parts had to be manufactured. A 218,000 lb. generator, two 106,000 alternators, came by plane. Added to that, believe it or not, 110 MILES of electrical cable was installed. More than enough to get a green car to your job and back.

Workers were at it 24 hours a day for three months, trying to get Splendor back in service.

Well, she’s back. Splendor sails roundtrip to the Mexican Riviera visiting Puerto Vallarta, Mazatlan, and Cabo San Lucas. Oops, for the moment let’s make that two days in Cabo and none in Mazatlan. Just after Splendor left for the Riviera, a shooting occurred in the Gold Zone shopping district.

Although no tourist was involved, the Gold Zone is a magnet for tourists. Great beaches, first-class hotels, good restaurants, and everyone speaks English. Jewelry shops are omnipresent. I had a lovely ring made there, but have second thoughts about going again. Nevertheless, the spectacular bargains in silver have my wife thinking about getting  a flack vest for our next trip.

Will Carnival decide to visit Mazatlan again? No se.

But visit or not there is nothing like a Carnival ship.

Splendor is aptly named.

Prior to her sailing, I had a dinner in one of her “standard” restaurants. Raves from the table. For most it was the best pasta carbonarra ever ingested. I had roast duck breast . . . unsurpassed. And the soup on any Carnival ship gets a top slurp award. Not to mention the hot lava chocolate fudge cake!

Even if Splendor just roamed around at sea, you would be getting the best value afloat. Just think how much you’ll save so you’ll be able to frolic at Senor Frogs.

Crystal Symphony 2010 Puerto Vallarta

January 7, 2011

For years Puerto Vallarta was a sleepy little village, and grew at an easy pace. Then John Huston showed up with Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton. The growth then reminded me of the way I like eggs; over easy. Now it reminds me of Miami.

Condos are popping up fertilized by Taylor and Burton, who, while they are no longer here, started it all. One of my favorite stories about the two stars is about the home they had (now a simple museum) on one side of the street and the home on the other side which was mostly converted into pool. Burton put up a high wall to keep prying paparazzi at bay. BUT, they had to cross the street to get that swim. Cameras ready 24 hours a day, the Canon creeps kept clicking away. What to do??

Mildly inebriated, but with tons of pesos, Richard built a bridge over the street. Now, no photos unless from a helicopter.

It’s a treat to look out at the lovely and gracefully ageing city.

Oops, wrong side of the ship.

Oops that side doesn’t work either.

And more going up…manana.

The only place now left with a fading shadow of the way “lo estaba”, is old town in the northern section. It’s worth the cab ride.

We are now heading back to Los Angeles

with monster storms awaiting us. Those who now join Symphony for her 14 day roundtrip to Hawaii can put their umbrellas away.

Ahead of Christmas Eve, I have to plug up my chimney. Afraid of rain? Nope, it’s so this dude doesn’t slide down.

Crystal Symphony 2010 Topolobampo

January 5, 2011

We are in Topolobampo. The reason we made this inaugural stop is to so those who want to transit the Copper Canyon by train can put another notch in their “I’ve been everywhere” belt. It’s almost an 18 hour trip. A 4 hour round trip bus transfer added to an 11 hour round trip train ride with a buffet lunch at the top and dinner on the train heading home. I hope it doesn’t rain.

To me, more fascinating than Copper Canyon, are the indigenous Tarahumara, some of whom still live in the canyon in caves, beneath rock outcroppings on cliffs, or in unpretentious cabins. These settlements are separated by harsh terrain. Today there are cell phones and texting, but before these tech goodies the only way villages could communicate was by messenger.

The Taramumara could literally run for days and I’m told it wasn’t unusual for one of these dudes to run 435 miles in one go. I find that hard to believe, but I understand that the way Tarahumara would hunt their prey was to chase them until their quarry quit, exhausted. Think how green it would be to hire them to deliver pizza. By the way, the rumor that their food staple was snails is yet to be confirmed.

Off in the distance was a town, maybe Topo, maybe not,

but I stayed on the ship to assess some of the refurbs on Symphony.

After 40 days of dry dock in Boston, a new Symphony surfaced. The Neptune pool disappeared and a lovely and comfortable lounging deck took its place. The Jacuzzis were melded into one big one.

That’s not me. I got in later, but didn’t know how to make it bubble. (The controls are in the end of the rectangle.) Be aware it is hot.

I love the couches

and 180 degree chairs.

Two women were in the Chair next to me and a bee that had been buzzing around my Joop shaving cologne decided their suntan oil was a better bet. I have never seen two bathing suited adults jump, and squeal, and leap, and duck, and hand flap with such abandon during their seat to pool scurry.

The Lido

has been pushed out and some of the outdoor space was taken. The tables left are set to accommodate four.

I have adopted a “please sir” face as I carry my plate and slowly walk amongst the twos. More often than not I’m invited to sit and join them. I’ve met some nice people.

My cabin is on Penthouse Deck 10. All penthouse cabins have been beautifully redone; change of layout, carpet, bathroom, etc.

Mine is kept perfectly by Jessica from Chile.

My dining room steward is Jose; wine steward Ana.

They make this a fun table and ease the boredom of eating alone.

In the evening, Nick Lewin, a wonderful sleight of hand magician and maybe the only magician funny enough to make the hoary three ropes into one entertaining,

gave us a peek into the mind of a magician. As his time on stage came close to ending, he checked his watch to see how much longer he had to go. With a HUGE effort I swallowed the urge to yell, *That’s my watch.” You see he had disappeared someone’s watch when he did his major show. Oh well.

Tomorrow Loreto and another production show, “The Envelope Please”.

For the best in cruising it’s AvidCruiser.com

Crystal Symphony 2010 Loreto

January 5, 2011

I stayed on the ship.

Years ago my wife and I vacationed in Loreto. Some paved streets, more not, and very few tourists. The beach was great, hotel good, and food perfect. One thing that comes close to standing out in my mind was the airline didn’t make advance seat reservations. If there were more passengers than seats, well tomorrow’s another day. The practice was to hire someone to wait in line for you on the day of the flight. I don’t remember the cost of this, but it was cheaper than another night at the hotel. So why didn’t I go ashore? I didn’t want to replace the fond memory of Loreto for the two newly married with whatever is now “up to date”.

Staying aboard Symphony is certainly not a chore. The botoxed Bistro is a favorite place of many to grab coffees, teas, and goodies.

The bar has been circularized (I can’t believe that’s a word”.

Ubiquitously on display are Christmas reminders. The computer center,

the cheese,

and even the ginger bowl.

This place must be scary around Halloween.

Each night Teodor brings canapés at around 4:45 PM.

Then it’s to dinner at 6:15. I love the dining room’s “first plates” that reflect the food scene of the night.

This was French night.

Actually, I wasn’t very hungry and I found by not eating, my table attracted all kinds of men in tuxedos asking about the food, did I want something else, etc. None could accept “I’m not very hungry.” (This is a cruise ship, idiot, everyone’s ready to eat all the time.)

In the evening, the Crystal Society members were invited to cocktails and dancing in the Starlight Club. The Crystal Society is Crystal’s guest loyalty program. Some of the people at this party have cruised Crystal since the Harmony first went to sea years ago. One even longer than that.

The production show yet again was hugely entertaining. The audience, in formal wear, was a bit reserved, applauding, but absolutely no vocalizing except, you guessed it, from me. Some of the dance numbers combined acrobatics; splits, cartwheels, leaps and in air somersaults; all performed with poise and style. So yes, I shouted out. YES!

Tomorrow Mazatlan.

(For the best in cruise news go to www.avidcruiser.com)



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